If you are struggling with your weight, the chances are that you also have a body image issue. According to “Fairburn“ (which is THE name to drop in conversations about food disorders btw) people with eating problems judge their self worth largely or even exclusively in terms of their shape, their weight and their ability to control them.
Do you think Is this you?
Do this exercise to find out !
List the things that are important to you in how you evaluate or judge yourself as a person.
Think of these as things you like to do well in: they may include your flower arranging skills, a network of friends, fitness, your shape and weight, maybe looking after your partner. Don’t put things here because you think they should be there. Spend time with yourself and really look at what is actually important to you.
Then, rank the items on your list into relative importance. Like it or not there are things you value more than others.
If you struggle a bit, you will find a hierarchy hidden in your list. You can judge this by how much time you spend thinking about and doing “the thing” . Ask yourself how much would it upset you if an item on your list went badly. Would being told your work was poor unsettle you more than arguing with a friend or gaining 1lb pound in weight.
If you did the what are your values task, you may find that handy
Put these into % terms and add them to a circle chart .
Here is my chart
Here is a chart from someone struggling with their weight .
Do your chart, and over the next week, recheck it. Does this represent the real you or are there things you have slipped in because they ought to be there. Did you forget something: its ok, add it!
If your weight issues occupy more than 1/3 you are probably “overconcerned”
But who cares?
Over concern has 3 specific problems.
- If your happiness depends on one aspect of your life, its very risky, if it goes wrong you are sort of screwed
- Overconcern with weight will be an issue because there will always be more attractive or slimmer people than you
- Overconcern plays a major role in maintaining weight issues.
The problem with having a massive slice devoted to weight concern means that your happiness sinks or swims on your weight and that you are missing out on other areas of your life.
I’ll explain how to fix this over the next few weeks, for now, do the circle chart!